Episode 93: "Eyes that Vainly Crave the Light” – The Sheridan Tapes
CONTENT WARNING: Elements of body horror and mind control, claustrophobia, references to cult activity and religiously motivated homophobia, and existential dread and despair
????2020_04: As Amanita leads the wayward travelers back to the surface, old secrets and new questions come to light.
Starring Chris Martin as Robert Quincy, Jesse Steele as Bill Tyler, Sarah Karnes as Lara Smith, Ezra J. Wayne as Ned Leroux, Van Winkle as Sam Bailey, and Alejandra Cejudo as Amanita, with original music by Jesse Haugen. Written by Van Winkle and produced by Virginia Spotts, with dialogue editing and sound design by Van Winkle.
For more information, additional content, and episode transcript, visit thesheridantapes.com
This episode was made possible by our supporters at Patreon.com/homesteadcorner, ko-fi.com/homesteadcorner, and our backers on Seed&Spark.
Script
Transcript
CONTENT WARNING: Elements of body horror and mind control, claustrophobia, references to cult activity and religiously motivated homophobia, and existential dread and despair
[Inside a quiet bedroom]
[Thunder rumbles outside]
[The bed squeaks as Rob moves]
[The house creaks in the wind]
Robert Quincy
It’s getting dark out.
Bill Tyler
I’m sure Sam and Ned will be back soon, love.
Robert Quincy
They’d better… I still think I saw someone out there earlier.
Bill Tyler
Well we haven’t seen it since… maybe it was just somebody else trapped in here, passing through.
Robert Quincy
I don’t think that’s very likely, Bill.
Bill Tyler
…maybe not.
[Pause]
Robert Quincy
What time is it?
[Rustle as Bill checks his phone]
Bill Tyler
I don’t know… phone’s still not showing the time. Feels like it should be… mid-afternoon, though?
Robert Quincy
It shouldn’t be this dark yet.
Bill Tyler
Blame the storm, I guess.
Robert Quincy
Bill, I don’t think this is just… normal weather.
Bill Tyler
What, you think Morrison has control of the weather in here now?
Robert Quincy
I mean… why wouldn’t he?
Bill Tyler
This isn’t the Source, Rob. He can’t just change things like that anymore. He might have more power in his… bubble, but I think the weather’s a little too big for him to mess with. This is probably just… a normal storm, from outside.
Robert Quincy
If there’s even an outside anymore.
[Brief pause, Bill turns to look at him]
Bill Tyler
What was that?
Robert Quincy
I mean… we keep talking about what’s outside the bubble, but what if there’s nothing left out there? We haven’t seen or heard anything that isn’t under Morrison’s control since we got back — what reason do we have to believe the outside world is somehow safe? What if he’s already taken it all over, and we just don’t know? What if he has just as much control here as he had in the Source, and he’s just giving us hope to mess with us—
[Bill interrupts him, rustle as he adjusts himself]
Bill Tyler
—Hey, hey… you stop that right now. Okay? We have no reason to think that. Unless Sam and Ned find something different out there, we can’t afford to think like that. Got it?
Robert Quincy
Yes, sir.
Bill Tyler
I’m serious, Rob. We need to rest. We need to be ready for whatever comes next.
Robert Quincy
Next? We barely got out of the Source in the first place, Bill. We have no idea what Morrison is planning, and even with Sam and Ned on our side, we don’t have any chance of killing him. What even can come next?
[Unnatural thunder rumbles in the distance]
[Pause]
[Rob sighs, and thinks]
Robert Quincy
Do you… do you still pray sometimes?
Bill Tyler
[Scoff] Are you serious? After what my folks put us through?
Robert Quincy
No, I don’t mean like that… just… not like, seriously praying, just… Wishing for something to get you through things alright? Not god exactly, but… I don’t know.
[Pause]
[Bill exhales]
Bill Tyler
Yeah. I hadn’t for a while, but when we were in the Source, I… I did it a lot. Almost constantly, actually. But it wasn’t a god that saved us.
[Thunder rumbles in the distance]
[Bill and Rob sit in silence]
[Outside, a set of footsteps walks on dirt, then stops, observing]
[Russel barks and howls]
[Cassette noises]
[Click]
[Main Theme]
Recording Begins
[Cassette noises]
[Click]
[Static fades]
[Four sets of footsteps underground, walking on dirt-covered tunnels]
[Wind howls quietly through the open space]
Lara Smith
So who is she?
Ned Leroux
She’s… Amanita.
Lara Smith
Yeah, I got that, but… Who is she?
Ned Leroux
Well, she used to be a cult member who worshiped fungus. Now…
Sam Bailey
Now she’s like… like Morrison. Made a deal with something beyond the veil and turned into something… new.
Lara Smith
How long has she been down here?
Sam Bailey
Since before this all started, I guess. She must have been caught down in the tunnels when Oslow returned.
Lara Smith
So… do we trust her, or should I just… [Lara shifts her rifle] you know.
Amanita
You’re more than welcome to try, Lara dear… [They all stop walking] but I doubt it would stick.
Lara Smith
I — I didn’t mean it seriously, I was just asking if, uh—
Amanita
Don’t worry, I won’t take it personally. [They begin walking again, with Amanita’s lead] I doubt bullets would have done you much good even before the coming of the god-king, and now… well. Death isn’t really a thing that can happen in this city anymore. Not outside of his will, anyway.
Lara Smith
What do you mean? I’ve killed dozens of those… faceless officers of his, and they stayed down.
Amanita
[She laughs] I’m sure they did. Besides, do any of you happen to know your way out of these tunnels? Killing me sounds like a surefire way of getting yourselves hopelessly lost in the dark, don’t you agree?
[They walk in the quiet]
[Ned catches up to her]
Ned Leroux
So… what’s a girl like you still doing in a place like this?
Amanita
I’d hardly call myself a girl anymore, Ned, but I appreciate the flattery. [Brief pause] It was not… easy to linger here. You saw it yourself — the way broken time pulled on my mind. But the Prophet would not let me forget the imbalance here, nor could she survive if it was allowed to spread beyond Oslow. I was in the midst of seeking out its cause when Morrison and his fortress-city were pulled back from the void… if I’m not mistaken, you two had something to do with that?
Ned Leroux
I mean… not intentionally, but I mean I guess we—
Lara Smith
Hold on… you helped him do this?
[They stop walking]
Sam Bailey
He tricked us, Lara. He was holding two of our friends captive, and when we tried to save them, he… you know.
Lara Smith
Actually, I don’t, Sam.
Amanita
Don’t blame these two, Lara… [They continue walking, slowly] Morrison trapped them between the devil and the sea, and they did the best they could, given the circumstances. They’re only human, after all. Close enough, anyway.
[A low dull moan, halfway between human and machine]
[They stop walking]
Sam Bailey
Uh… Amanita. What the hell was that?
Amanita
See for yourself.
Ned Leroux
Lara, do you still have that flashlight on you?
Lara Smith
Uh yeah… one second.
[She switches her flashlight on]
[They all gasp at the sight]
Sam Bailey
Holy shit…
Lara Smith
Is… is that…
Amanita
Morrison sent his thralls into the tunnels to flush me out more than once. I simply made the most of the situation.
Ned Leroux
How many of them are there?
Lara Smith
I don’t know… I can’t see the end of them from here.
[She steps closer] What… what’s that growing all over them?
Sam Bailey
Mycelium. She’s absorbed them into her colony.
Amanita
Is that judgment I hear in your voice, Bailey? Surely you don’t think these things are anything close to human. They are simply extensions of Morrison’s will, made manifest.
Sam Bailey
And what if they weren’t?
Amanita
Then they would certainly make better acolytes. As it is… well, they’re just sapient enough to maintain the Prophet’s consciousness, while I’m separated from my family.
Sam Bailey
…Morrison’s bubble cuts you off from the rest of the Oraculites?
Amanita
I’m afraid so, Sam. I can barely hear the voice of my creator here. I’m sure your patron feels further away from you than it ever has before. And none of us can cross the veil and be united with them while his power persists.
Ned Leroux
Wait… what do you mean, we can’t cross the veil?
Amanita
This pocket of altered reality is sustained by Morrison’s will alone. He cannot sever it completely from the Source of all that was and was not and will be again… at least, not yet. But he can keep those within his domain from escaping into the waters of the infinite to warn others. [Chuckles, turning to Sam] You know, I would have thought you’d be the one to figure that out.
Sam Bailey
We, uh… we just got back from a… fairly rough trip through the Source. None of us are too keen on repeating that.
Ned Leroux
You weren’t exactly keen the first time.
Sam Bailey
In either case, we haven’t been back long enough for either of us to try that yet. I mean, we… We only realized we couldn’t physically escape like… what, a few days ago?
Amanita
[She laughs darkly] My goodness, Sam — still clinging to your old perceptions of time, are you?
Sam Bailey
What do you mean by that?
Amanita
How long do you think it’s been, Bailey? Since Oslow re-emerged from the waves of chaos? Since you arrived in this remade city? Since we entered these tunnels?
Sam Bailey
I… I don’t know.
Amanita
It’s like a dream, isn’t it? Whenever you try to think about time in here… about how much time has passed. There are events, and you can put them in order, but the time between them… well. It’s more… metaphorical than actual, wouldn’t you say?
Within the circle of Morrison’s influence, time is as broken as it can be on this side of the veil. Entropy wears on as it always does, but the people here… their lives go round and round in loops. Reliving the same day over and over again. And even if they manage to escape their cells and make it down below to feel the prophet’s touch… they vanish from these tunnels before the transformation can be complete.
Sam Bailey
So you’re still trying to make more of your zombies, huh?
Amanita
We’ve had this argument before Bailey, and it’s as childish as it ever was. They are not zombies — I am inviting them into the blessed union of the prophet, allowing them to become more than they are—
Sam Bailey
Haven’t these people suffered enough already? Morrison’s trapped them all in one living nightmare, the least you could do is not subject them to another!
[Brief pause]
Amanita
I’m trapped here too, Sam. Trapped, and alone. Do you have any idea what that feels like for someone like me? To not hear the voices of my family? The voice of my prophet? I have not been this alone since before I changed, and now I’m stuck here — just as powerless as you are. I can’t escape, I can’t stop Morrison, and I can’t fix time. So you will forgive me if I do what little I can to make it better.
Lara Smith
This is wrong. This is… just wrong.
[Amanita turns to her]
Amanita
And why is that, Lara? What is it about the blessed union of flesh and fungus that you find so repulsive?
Lara Smith
You can’t just… take away people’s free will like this. It isn’t right.
[Amanita steps closer to her]
Amanita
Let me make this as clear as I can for you, child — one, these things aren’t people. And two — the union of bliss does not take away free will. It simply makes it less… obsessively individual.
Lara Smith
How is that any better? That sounds worse than just being a zombie.
Amanita
[She laughs] Of course you’d say that.
Lara Smith
What the hell’s that supposed to mean?
Amanita
There’s no use in getting angry, Lara… after all, we’ve already established that your gun won’t do you any good down here. And besides — the prophet grants many gifts to his acolytes. I can read you like an open book, child: all the choices you ever made to avoid being part of your community, taking responsibility for your actions, giving anything of yourself for the greater good.
Lara Smith
Don’t you dare lecture me about the greater good, bitch — people like Morrison preach that shit, and look where it’s got all of us. Greater good is just what’s good for those on top, and it’s never put a cent in my pocket or a scrap of food on my table. I do that — me, and nobody else.
Amanita
Is that so? You think you’re so self-sufficient, with your little plot of land and your herd of cattle and the guns you defend it with? Who built the road between your farm and Oslow? Who cut and milled the lumber which built your home? Who harvested the grain which feeds your cattle? How many unseen billions of microorganisms gave of themselves to fertilize the fields which grew it? Goodness, who manufactured the rifle you carry at your side like it’s a part of you? And yet you insist on waging a one-woman crusade against anyone who dares suggest there may be more to your existence than your own self-interests… your own needs.
Lara Smith
So what, you’re saying Morrison’s right? That we owe him some kind of birth-debt for existing and we should all just… roll over and accept our lot?
Amanita
Of course not. But you’re fighting a system, Lara… you always have been. And when you’re alone, the best you can hope for is to get yourself stuck between the gears. At worst, you just become another cog in the crushing wheel.
Lara Smith
I am never going to let that happen.
Amanita
No?
Lara Smith
I’d rather die than let Morrison use me like that.
Amanita
Really? And what about you Ned? What do you think of our new friend’s iron-willed conviction?
Ned Leroux
Me?
Amanita
You entered Morrison’s orbit with every intention of betraying him, didn’t you? You saw an easy mark, a tool to use for your own selfish aims — and for a moment, it seemed like you’d gotten everything you’d ever hoped for and more. Security. Power. Friendship — maybe even more than friends. But for all that… Morrison used you instead: sent you out as bait to set the stage for his grand ascension. Without you, I doubt any of this would have happened.
[Brief pause]
Sam Bailey
Back off, Amanita.
Amanita
Why? Did I say something untrue?
Sam Bailey
I saw Ned risk his own existence in the Source. Not just to save Bill, but to go after Rob as well. Someone he barely knew before all this. If Morrison manipulated anything, it was his selflessness, not his selfishness.
Amanita
[She laughs] Indeed.
[Amanita continues down the tunnels]
[Sam stares at Ned]
Sam Bailey
What?
Ned Leroux
It… it’s nothing.
[Ned follows after Amanita]
[Lara turns to Sam]
Lara Smith
Was Bill the, uh… the other officer he came to my house with?
Sam Bailey
Yeah. Why?
Lara Smith
Huh. [Changing subject] We should go after them, we don’t want to lose our way down here.
Sam Bailey
Oh, definitely not.
[The two follow after Ned and Amanita]
[Click]
[Silence]
[Click]
[They all breathe hard as they emerge into the open air of ground level]
[Creaking as the hatch is closed]
Amanita
And here we are — above the earth once more. I’m sure y’all will breathe a bit easier beneath an open sky.
Sam Bailey
Did the sun go down already?
Ned Leroux
Guess so.
Lara Smith
How long were we underground?
Amanita
Unknown and unknowable… Within Morrison’s domain, time runs in fits and starts at the god-king’s whim.
Lara Smith
Within Morrison’s… aren’t we out of the city now?
[A heavy spotlight clunks on and shines at them]
Ned Leroux
Get down!
[They all duck except Amanita, who begins to laugh]
Sam Bailey
Amanita! Amanita, get out of the light, they can see you!
Amanita
They can see me well enough without it, Sam… all of us.
[Lara stands]
Lara Smith
Why aren’t they firing?
Ned Leroux
Maybe we’re out of range?
Lara Smith
Doubt that — I’ve seen ‘em hit targets halfway across the city dead-center. No way we’re far enough from the walls here.
Sam Bailey
Then what are they waiting for?
Amanita
[She laughs] Nothing. They won’t fire, believe you me. The god-king hasn’t willed our deaths to be, and so they won’t… not yet, at least.
[Lara steps towards her]
Lara Smith
And how the hell do you know that?
Amanita
Because if he had, he wouldn’t have let you two slip away with Lara in the first place. He wouldn’t have let his snipers miss their shots time and again as you fled. And he wouldn’t have stopped sending his “officers” after us until we were all flushed out of the tunnels and killed.
Sam Bailey
He didn’t want to kill us… he just wanted us out of Oslow.
Amanita
Right you are, Bailey… powerful as he is, the god-king cannot abide the presence of rival powers within his holy city. Now that you two are gone, he can continue his work uninterrupted — perfecting the citizens of Oslow and feeding off their suffering to grow his domain.
Ned Leroux
Wait… are you saying that the bubble’s… expanding?
Amanita
I am indeed… not quickly, but getting faster day by day. The Earth and all within it were born from the Source, and everything upon its surface is suffused with power to one degree or another. Every stone and tree and cloud in the sky… and the more ground Morrison claims, the stronger he becomes.
Lara Smith
I need to get back. I can’t let Morrison keep doing this, I can’t let him win.
Sam Bailey
Come with us.
[Sam steps towards Lara]
Lara Smith
The hell did you just say?
Sam Bailey
Come back with us. We have a place outside the city, with more survivors. It’s… shielded from Morrison’s influence, at least partially. We can work together — figure out how to stop Morrison before it’s too late and—
Lara Smith
—No.
Sam Bailey
No?
Lara Smith
No. This is my war to fight, and much as I’d appreciate the help, more people just means more risk of being found out. Besides, if your friends are anything like you two, I don’t want to be outvoted by a bunch of people who just want to sit around and wait for things to get worse. I’m taking Morrison down my way, from inside the cage.
[Brief pause]
[Amanita groans and sighs]
Amanita
I can lead you back to where you started through the tunnels… the officers have probably returned to their patrols by now, so the way should be clear.
Sam Bailey
So I guess this is goodbye then.
Lara Smith
Yep, reckon it is.
[Ned steps towards Lara]
Ned Leroux
Good luck in there Lara. And… sorry.
Lara Smith
For what?
Ned Leroux
For… the part I played in what happened to you. What Morrison’s done.
Lara Smith
Hey, he tricked us both. Only thing that matters now is killing that bastard before he does more harm, right?
Ned Leroux
…right.
Amanita
Sam? A moment alone, before we go.
Sam Bailey
Uh… sure.
[Sam and Amanita walk a short distance away, then stop]
[She looks at him for a moment]
Amanita
You know this is the third time that I have saved you, do you not?
Sam Bailey
Is it?
Amanita
Once from your own stupidity in the Source. Once in the tunnels twisted by Morrison’s transformation. And now once more, below his nightmare city. Do you know why I’ve done this?
Sam Bailey
I… I can’t really say, no.
Amanita
For the same reason I taught you how to traverse the veil in the first place. For the same reason I remained here below the earth, seeking the truth of Morrison’s machinations. And the same reason I am giving you… this.
[She pulls a small tightly-wrapped package from her jacket and hands it to Sam]
Sam Bailey
What is it?
Amanita
The will of the Prophet. Don’t worry… it won’t harm you. It’s more dangerous to me than you, truth be told.
[He steps forward and takes it]
[Sam turns the bundle over in his hands, then begins unwrapping the cloth]
Amanita
Don’t open it! At least, not until Lara and I are underground once more.
Sam Bailey
You keep saying it’s the will of the Prophet that you help me, but why should your god care about my survival? I’m not a part of your colony… I never will be.
Amanita
[She laughs gently] I wouldn’t be so sure of that, Sam Bailey. But it’s not your potential place in our fellowship that’s preserved you, Sam… it is the role you will play in saving it.
Sam Bailey
Saving it? How?
Amanita
I told you that the fracturing of time began in the tunnels, Sam — long ago, long before you ever came to Oslow. And while I still don’t know what caused it, I felt the touch of another presence in that aberration… a presence like mine, touched by the infinite and immensely powerful. A presence that felt so familiar I could almost recognize it in the dark, and finally…
Sam Bailey
Wait… are you saying that — I’m…
Amanita
I still don’t know how or what or when, but between you and those tunnels, there is a way — a way to repair the damage done to time and unmake Morrison’s holy city. To set the world to… well, not right per-se. But to remedy the hurt he’s done, at least. To preserve the Prophet and her children into the future, and prevent our unmaking with the unraveling of time.
Sam Bailey
…how?
Amanita
That, I cannot see. But I trust that you and your band of misfits will find the way. You always do.
[She turns around]
[Calling out] Come Lara — it’s time for us to go.
[She turns back to look at Sam] I leave the future in your hands, Sam Bailey. Try to make it a good one.
[Amanita walks off and leads Lara back to the hatch]
[Creak of metal as it opens, they climb down a short distance, and the hatch is closed again]
[Ned walks up to Sam]
[Sam opens the package]
Ned Leroux
What is it?
Sam Bailey
It’s… some kind of plant cone. I’m not sure what kind. It looks… oddly familiar.
[Pause]
Ned Leroux
Let’s get back to Jerry’s before the loop resets… it must be close to midnight already. Maybe he has some reference books on plants.
Sam Bailey
Good call. Come on, the main road should be…
[Static spikes on the tape, and Sam freezes]
[Sam’s voice is filled with distortion]
Ned Leroux
Sam? What’s wrong?
Sam Bailey
Can’t you feel that?
Ned Leroux
I… yeah, kind of… it’s faint though. What is that?
Sam Bailey
It’s… it’s the lake. Agate Shore. I haven’t felt it like this since… since before Morrison came back.
Ned Leroux
I thought it was outside the bubble.
Sam Bailey
It is! At least, I think it still is. But… [Pause] Something’s wrong. Something’s very, very wrong.
[Clack]
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