Episode 29: “All Things in Earth and Heaven”

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CONTENT WARNING: Astrophobia, mentions of implied homophobia, dread, and loud noises (including thunder)

10222019c: On a late night patrol, Lieutenant Bill Tyler struggles to connect with his new partner when a strange call from a farm outside Oslow brings both of them into contact with an otherworldly threat…

Starring Jesse Steele as Bill Tyler, Ezra J. Wayne as Ned Leroux, Sarah Karnes as Lara Smith, Chris Martin as Robert Quincy, Carmina Manley as Dispatch, and Mike Kennedy as Edgar Morrison, with original music by Jesse Haugen. Written by Virginia Spotts and produced by Trevor Van Winkle and Virginia Spotts, and made possible by our supporters at Patreon.com/homesteadcorner and ko-fi.com/homesteadcorner

For more information, additional content, and episode transcript, visit thesheridantapes.com

Script

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Transcript

CONTENT WARNING: Astrophobia, mentions of implied homophobia, dread, and loud noises (including thunder)

Cold Open

[In the distance, a train rumbles by]

[Someone closes a building door]

[Footsteps]

[A car door opening and closing]

BILL TYLER

[Yawns]

Another all-nighter. God…

[Bill takes out his phone & taps on his phone screen]

[Voicemail tone]

[During the voicemails, the sound of traffic outside continues]

ROBERT QUINCY (Voicemail)

Hi Billy, it’s Rob. You’re probably already getting into work, but could you please pick up some olive oil on your way home? Or, I guess any oil’s fine. Olive oil can be a little expensive. Whatever you think.

Look, everything you told me last night has been… weighing on me today. I want to talk again about this sometime. I don’t know how I’ll be able to go back to work after…

[Sighs]

Anyway… love you. Have a good shift.

[Beep. The next message starts to play]

ROBERT QUINCY (Voicemail)

Hi love, me again. I’ve been thinking, I would really, really like to talk to talk to you when you get home about… Your job.

You know what I mean. I don’t think we’ve really discussed it and I think it’s worth… well, I’ll see you when you get back.

[Beep.}

ROBERT QUINCY (Voicemail)

Okay, last one, I promise. You must be working late again – God, aren’t we the worst with voicemails?

Anyway I just wanted to say that I am not here to make you feel bad. I want to work together to figure out a solution to this whole thing… And…

I just gave Morrison my two week’s. Well, one week, actually. I know that probably isn’t a surprise since our talk last night, but… anyway. We can talk about it when you get back.

It’s just… I want to be united on this, you know? I’m still mad that you took so long to tell me everything.

Well… Speaking about united… I am hoping that… after our talk… We could both watch that marathon of Antiques Roadshow that’s on tonight and it’s okay if you fall asleep okay bye love youuu!

[Beep]

BILL TYLER

[laughs]

Well… There goes a second paycheck. Shit.

[His phone starts to vibrate]

[“Beep” as he answers it]

BILL TYLER

Well hello my love, I knew you couldn’t help yourself…

Oh, Jesus – [flustered] Yes, it certainly is ma’am, how… Uh, what can I do for you?

You’re what? Wait, wait… Could you repeat your name, please?

[Cassette noises]

Kate… Sheridan?

Main Theme

Recording Begins

[Bill’s body cam sparks to life through the static]

[The sound of the road under tires]

NED LEROUX

Gets awful cold up here, doesn’t it?

BILL TYLER

Huh?

NED LEROUX

Just… I wasn’t expecting it to be this cold in Nevada, is all.

BILL TYLER

Oh, yeah, that’s… The elevation will do that to you. Maybe you were thinking of Vegas.

NED LEROUX

Maybe.

[A moment of silence]

BILL TYLER

[Coughs]

So, uh… Ned, you uh… Doing anything with your family for the holidays?

[The sound of a turn signal]

NED LEROUX

Haven’t got any plans, no.

Don’t actually have any family. Parents died a while back, no siblings, not really close with anyone else…

BILL TYLER

Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.

NED LEROUX

I have a girlfriend out in Paris, but holidays are… Well, they’re real busy for her.

BILL TYLER

A girlfriend… In Paris?

NED LEROUX

[Laughs]

She’s an executive. Works for a cosmetics company – can’t say

which one.

[He laughs again]

We get together from time to time, when she can get away.

BILL TYLER

How did, uh… How did you two meet?

NED LEROUX

She flew in to Houston for a meeting, someone robbed her hotel room, and I was called out to deal with it. The rest is history. What about you Bill? Any plans?

BILL TYLER

Well… Robert and I aren’t close to either of our families, but – we’ve got our own traditions. Usually have friends over, throw a holiday party, do a little White Elephant thing.

NED LEROUX

That sounds… Fun.

BILL TYLER

It is! Though I don’t know how many people we’ll have over this year. You know, you should come, you know.

NED LEROUX

You sure you want big-city Leroux killing the mood?

BILL TYLER

Hey, Martinez called you that, not me. And I mean… It’s not a big deal. You’re from Houston, not… L.A. or anything like that.

NED LEROUX

[Laugh]

Nah, it’s fine. I don’t need everyone we work with to like me. And I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea.

BILL TYLER

No, no, you just… Take a little while to warm up to people, that’s all. That’s normal. And the first month anywhere is weird, especially a new job.

NED LEROUX

So what does Robert do for work, then?

[A brief pause, then Bill laughs]

NED LEROUX

What did I say?

BILL TYLER

You know he works in dispatch, right? You must have spoken to him, like… A dozen times already.

NED LEROUX

Oh. Damn. Uh… No wonder I never made detective.

BILL TYLER

That why you had to leave Houston, huh? Couldn’t keep up?

[A moment of silence]

BILL TYLER

[Clears throat]

I was… It was only a joke.

NED LEROUX

I just needed a change of pace. The city, the noise… I had to get away. But that’s a good one, Tyler, that’s a good one.

I’m surprised that hasn’t come up before.

BILL TYLER

What?

NED LEROUX

Robert working in dispatch. You don’t think that gets in the way of work?

BILL TYLER

Oh… No, Robert’s a total pro. And he cares a lot too – I mean, I do as well, we just figure we don’t need to talk about it at work if it’s not important. And this job’s about… Taking care of people, you know. Working as a… As a team.

NED LEROUX

Huh. Well… Good for you two. I never would have known.

[Beep & static on the radio as a dispatcher comes through]

DISPATCHER

5-540, you doing anything right now?

[Beep]

BILL TYLER

Just another crazy night in Oslow. What’s up?

[Beep]

DISPATCHER

We just got a call up Elk County Road… 8037. Mystery lights again.

[Beep]

BILL TYLER

Another UFO call? What’s that, like, five this month?

[Beep]

DISPATCHER

Ugh, try to take this one seriously… They sound pretty shaken up.

[Beep]

BILL TYLER

10-4. We’re on our way.

[Bill hangs up the receiver]

BILL TYLER

Well, so much for a quiet night. You been on one of these calls before?

NED LEROUX

Nope. Thought this might happen, though.

BILL TYLER

Well, you’re in for a treat. Or at the very least, some overtime.

[He speeds up]

[Bill’s body cam cuts out in a wash of static]

[Later, Bill fiddles with his body cam as the signal emerges back out of the static]

[Footsteps crunch through mud and loose gravel]

BILL TYLER

…Stupid body cam keeps shutting itself off…

[Cows mooing in the distance]

NED LEROUX

Sure this is the place?

BILL TYLER

Yeah, looks like it.

[He opens the screen door slightly]

[He knocks on the front door]

[Footsteps, and the door opens]

BILL TYLER

Good evening, Ma’am, we just received a call about a…

LARA SMITH

‘Bout time ya’ll showed up! I’ve got my old rifle on the back porch aimed at it, but I don’t think that’ll help much if you don’t…

BILL TYLER

Whoa, whoa, slow down please. It’s alright. You have a firearm pointed at it? Pointed at what?

NED LEROUX

And could you give us your name, please?

LARA SMITH

Lara. Lara Smith. And yes, I do have my rifle on it. Whatever it is, it’s in the barn out back and doesn’t want to come out.

BILL TYLER

Did you see it? Before it went into the barn?

LARA SMITH

Not really. It was just… First I saw of it, there was this bright light in the sky, like some kind of flare or something, flickering over and over again like – I don’t know, some kind of SOS. I heard it come crashing down through the new roof I just put on the barn, and there was this noise like… Like a wave of static or something. Nearest neighbors are at least a mile off and they still gave me a call to see if I was okay. The ground around the barn’s all scorched and the walls just keep… Well, disappearing.

NED LEROUX

Miss Smith, what do you mean by… Disappearing?

LARA SMITH

Don’t take that tone with me, officer – I mean what I said. The walls keep disappearing. Power keeps going in and out too. I tried to get closer and see what it is, but… I don’t know, something feels wrong about the air out there. That’s when I called.

BILL TYLER

We’ll… Take a look and see what we can find, Ma’am.

[Door creaks slightly]

LARA SMITH

When are the rest of you getting here?

BILL TYLER

Rest of who?

LARA SMITH

The other police officers. I told them to send as many as they could find.

NED LEROUX

We should be able to handle this on our own, Miss Smith.

BILL TYLER

If we need backup, we’ll call it in. Is the barn out that way?

LARA SMITH

Well, yes, but I’m telling you, you need to call for backup right now. I saw the truck out there get lifted ten feet in the air and dropped a few minutes ago, and it’s…

BILL TYLER

Wait – are you saying the truck was floating?

NED LEROUX

Miss Smith, do you think there’s any chance the noises you heard were some kind of wild animal trapped in there?

LARA SMITH

[Scoffs]

Honey, I don’t know who put glue in  your fruit loops, but there’s no way that’s just a wild animal.

BILL TYLER

He’s not saying it is, we just want to know if…

LARA SMITH

You know any animal that can lift a goddamn rust trap farm truck with its mind? You don’t believe me, go out there and see for yourself. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.

[Lara slams the door]

BILL TYLER

Well.

NED LEROUX

Well.

BILL TYLER

Guess we’d better go check it out, then.

[They begin walking through dirt & scrawny grass]

[A cow moos in the distance]

NED LEROUX

Don’t see any obvious issues with the wiring out here. Transformers looked okay on the road, too.

BILL TYLER

You mean besides being old as hell? [He laughs] This place has definitely seen better days.

NED LEROUX

You said it.

BILL TYLER

She probably would’ve been better off selling the house instead of replacing the barn, I mean. Don’t know how much longer it has left.

NED LEROUX

Is this what usually happens with these calls?

BILL TYLER

Yeah, mostly. They usually don’t turn up anything, and if they do… Well, all we can really do is get people out of harm’s way.

NED LEROUX

Hmm.

[A strange noise in the distance]

NED LEROUX

Must be the barn up ahead.

BILL TYLER

Yeah, looks like it.

[He scoffs and turns]

Miss Smith! Please lower your weapon and get inside.

LARA SMITH

Your funeral…

[Lara closes the window]

BILL TYLER

[Chuckling slightly]

Alright, we’re in the clear.

[They resume walking]

NED LEROUX

Huh… Hey Tyler, look at this.

BILL TYLER

Yeah, what’s up?

NED LEROUX

All the plants around the barn – they look like they’ve been scorched black. See?

BILL TYLER

Yeah… Looks like something burned through here recently. There’s definitely something in the barn, too – you hear that?

[They stop and listen]

[A strange noise in the distance]

NED LEROUX

Let’s get in a little closer.

BILL TYLER

Closer?

[Ned walks forward, Bill follows]

[The strange noise continues]

NED LEROUX

You know, there’s a theory about why there are so many UFO sightings in Nevada.

BILL TYLER

Yeah? Why’s that?

NED LEROUX

Same reason humans came here at first: mining. There’s something out in the desert that they need.

BILL TYLER

[Nervous chuckle]

Sure, if you actually believe they’re…

Wait a minute. Shine your flashlight up there. No, there. Those tires. And that bale of hay. Are they…

NED LEROUX

Floating. Just a little bit.

BILL TYLER

Are you sure that isn’t just…

NED LEROUX

No, I don’t think it’s a trick of the light Bill. They’re floating.

BILL TYLER

What is…

[A sudden harsh static rises, along with a sound that’s

almost like paper ripping. A moment later it reverses, then

happens again]

BILL TYLER

Jesus! Ned, tell me you’re not seeing what I’m seeing.

NED LEROUX

That depends. Are you talking about the side of the barn atomizing and coming back together over there? Or about the 3-ton pickup truck hovering over the ground behind it?  Or is there something else I missed?

[Leroux starts walking closer]

BILL TYLER

Lieutenant!

NED LEROUX

Just getting a closer look, Tyler.

BILL TYLER

Ned, that’s enough! Stop!

NED LEROUX

I can get closer, Tyler. I know I can. I need to see what we’re dealing with.

[Electricity suddenly arcs from the barn, striking a tree nearby]

[Rumbling thunder, and the wind picks up]

BILL TYLER

Shit… Do you have rubber soles?

NED LEROUX

What?

BILL TYLER

Your soles! Are they real rubber?

NED LEROUX

Of course, yes!

BILL TYLER

Just, try to stay away from the scorched areas! I’m going to get Miss Smith… Try to be careful!

NED LEROUX

Got it!

[Bill turns and speaks into his radio]

BILL TYLER

5-540 to dispatch, Code Grey Alpha, I repeat, Code Grey Alpha. 8037 Elk County Road, respond immediately.

[Beep]

DISPATCHER

10-4 540. Greyhound en route. Clear area and await further orders.

[Beep]

BILL TYLER

10-4 Dispatch, over and out.

Ned! Ned, we need to go! I’ll meet you back at the cruiser in two minutes!

[Bill catches up to Lara at the front of the house]

LARA SMITH

What the hell are you two…

BILL TYLER

We need to get you out of here, now. Don’t go back for anything, don’t ask any questions, just get in the car.

[Footsteps]

LARA SMITH

What’s going on? I’m not letting that thing get my house!

BILL TYLER

Our team’s on their way to deal with it, but we need to get out of their way first.

[Car doors open as they get in]

[The sound of a seatbelt being buckled]

BILL TYLER

You have your seatbelt fastened?

[Bill starts the car and turns it around in the driveway]

LARA SMITH

What are you doing? Why aren’t we going?

BILL TYLER

My partner’s still back there.

LARA SMITH

He’s out there with that thing? Well, he’s a goner.

[Rumbling increases in the distance]

BILL TYLER

Come on, Leroux, come on…

[Muffled, running footsteps approach]

There he is! Crazy sonofabitch…

[Ned jumps into the passenger seat, panting]

NED LEROUX

Drive.

[Bill peels out while Leroux catches his breath]

BILL TYLER

Are you hurt?

NED LEROUX

What? No, no, I didn’t get close enough. I only got a glimpse at what was inside, something like a… A ball of lightning. It was…

BILL TYLER

Uh, Ned, Ned, come on. Let’s leave this for the debrief, alright?

[A loud helicopter swoops overhead]

LARA SMITH

What in the hell – that a goddamn military helicopter flying at my house? You can’t take my firearms you know, I have the legal right to carry…

[Lara is cut off by Leroux closing the partition between

them]

NED LEROUX

That’s enough of that.

BILL TYLER

Ned, she’s not detained, she’s scared.

NED LEROUX

Yeah, well… So am I.

[Bill’s body cam cuts out again, washed in static]

[Later, Bill fiddles with his body cam]

[We can hear voices in the distance]

BILL TYLER

Damn thing won’t stay on today… There we go.

[He walks up towards the front of the house]

[Chatter in the background on the radio]

EDGAR MORRISON

…you have every right to be. But I’m glad you called when you did. Unfortunately, this has become a classified matter, and we can’t…

LARA SMITH

Classified, my ass. My barn’s a crater! There’s tire tracks all over my yard, not to mention a goddamn Apache helicopter screaming out of the sky and scaring all my cattle off, and now you say you won’t even tell me what you found in there? In my own home? And who were those people? Army? CIA?

EDGAR MORRISON

Your alarm is completely warranted. If this had happened to me, I’m sure I would have the same questions. But you have my assurance: your home is completely safe. The people you saw were members of our SWAT team, men and women I would trust with my life, who came out here to make sure you and your property are safe and protected. As to the damages that occurred…

In four to six weeks, you’re going to see a check show up in your mailbox for enough money to cover the costs of any repairs you see fit to make.

BILL TYLER

Sir?

LARA SMITH

Check from the government? Heard that one before.

EDGAR MORRISON

[Chuckling]

Here… This is my card. If it doesn’t show up by the time I said it would, then give me a call. I’ll see to it that you get your money personally.

LARA SMITH

[Laughs]

Alright. You’ve got yourself a deal then, chief…

EDGAR MORRISON

Morrison. Feel free to call me Edgar, though.

LARA SMITH

Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to…

EDGAR MORRISON

Oh, yes, of course.

[Lara steps past him and into the house, shutting the door]

[Morrison turns to Bill]

EDGAR MORRISON

Good work, Tyler. I hope Leroux wasn’t too shaken up by all this?

BILL TYLER

Uh… No, not really.

EDGAR MORRISON

Well… Make sure he’s okay, all the same. City cop, first big trouble call… It can take a toll. We don’t want another… You know. Understood?

BILL TYLER

Yes sir.

EDGAR MORRISON

You’d best get home – it’s been a long night.

[Footsteps as Morrison walks away]

BILL TYLER

I didn’t know there was a fund for this kind of thing.

EDGAR MORRISON

Well… People need to be reassured that we’re here for them. And officially, there isn’t a fund. You didn’t hear that.

BILL TYLER

Yes, sir. Well… Goodnight.

[Bill gets back inside his own car]

[He buckles his seatbelt]

[He starts the car]

BILL TYLER

Hell of a day, huh Ned?

[Bill drives off]

BILL TYLER

Uh… Hello? Earth to Ned? You alright?

NED LEROUX

Huh? Oh, yeah, of course. I was just thinking… It’s interesting. I didn’t think a department of this size would have those kinds of resources. We had some of that in Houston but… We didn’t get any calls quite like this one.

BILL TYLER

A little bit more than you bargained for in little old Oslow, huh?

NED LEROUX

Not more, just… Different. We didn’t get calls about close encounters ten miles out of town, you don’t get calls for five homicides in a week. I suppose it was… Well, kind of thrilling.

I mean it felt satisfying, being able to help someone. Whatever was happening in that barn, it’s…

How long has Morrison been here, anyway? If he’s able to call in that kind of response, I mean.

BILL TYLER

Well… Decades, at least. His whole career, I’m pretty sure. I mean, he’s not very open about his life, but I know he’s been around for a while. I think he used to work for the government before, but… I don’t really know.

NED LEROUX

[Chuckles]

You were fantastic back there.

BILL TYLER

What’s that?

NED LEROUX

Getting Miss Smith out. Making sure she was safe. I was too distracted by the barn to even think about her, and…

BILL TYLER

Hey, I’m sure if it was the other way around, you’d do the same thing.

NED LEROUX

Maybe. You care a lot about people, I can tell that much. I think that’s awfully admirable.

BILL TYLER

Careful Leroux… That almost sounded like a compliment.

NED LEROUX

Well…

BILL TYLER

Hey, and don’t discount what you did. I never would have gotten anywhere near that barn, much less looked inside it. It was… Kind of badass, to be honest. All these unexplainable things happening in Oslow – sometimes I think they should bother me more than they do, but… Honestly? I just can’t let it get to me, you know? Why bother trying to figure it out if there are no answers. I’ll just drive myself crazy. So I stick to the problems I know I can fix.

NED LEROUX

You know what, Tyler? I think we’re going to get along just fine.

[They both chuckle]

[Bill groans]

NED LEROUX

What’s wrong?

BILL TYLER

I just realized how much paperwork we’re going to have to do for all of this.

NED LEROUX

[Groans]

Oh Jesus, I completely forgot. I was hoping to grab a drink before the bars close.

BILL TYLER

Me too. Rain check?

NED LEROUX

Rain check.

[Beep]

[Recording cuts out]

[Silence]

[Clacking of keys]

[Phone ringing]

[The audio is distorted and slightly tinny, heard through a

phone]

BILL TYLER

Wait, wait… Could you repeat your name, please?

Kate… Sheridan? How did you get this number?

Ma’am, I have to ask you to calm down and…

Fine, Kate… Do you have any training for this kind of thing? Investigating a disappearance, I mean?

Alright, I’m going to have to stop you there. I’m telling you, we’re doing everything we can about your sister’s case. I promise.

Listen, I understand, but there are elements at play that directly compromise the safety of others. We can’t…

No, I can’t tell you anything about that either. Because I have  a responsibility to… [sighs] Mmhmm. Mmhmm. I understand.

Kate, I understand that you’re concerned about your sister, but I have to keep you out of this for everyone’s safety. Including your own.

Alright, Kate. I’m sorry I can’t do more.

You too.

[The call ends]

[Bill sighs]

[The audio still sounds like it’s coming through a phone]

[He taps out a text message]

“I’m sorry Rob, I have to go out of town for the day. Be back late tomorrow. Wouldn’t go unless I had to. Talk when I get back. Love you.”

[Small electronic whoosh as he sends it] 

[Bill turns the key and starts the car, pulling away into the night]

[Recording fades into static]

Recording Ends


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